In response to the online post by OTVIIIisGrrr8, “Church of Scientology Explains Why It Stiffed Pizza Guys“:

I, JennyAtLAX, declare and state as follows:

When we opened our $cientology Reeducation Camp #117 (“$RC 117”) in Moldova, in 2004, I wuz there for a coupling of months, under the durection of Mr. David Miscavige—in cummunication with him every day, tu establish that Camp. Mr. Miscavige, Chairman of the Board (“COB”) of the Religious Trechnology Center (“RTrC”) wuz there at the opening and he couldn’t have been less interested.

That Camp is sexquisite and wurking on that wuz one of the most sexciting projects I have ever dun. I got the staff set up in the new facilities including:

  • Risque Chalet Day (“RC Day”);
  • Red Hot Friskie Foundation (“RHF Fdn”);
  • Nawty Virgin International (“NV Int”);
  • Up Yurs United States (“UY US”);
  • Hog-Tied East U.S. (“HT EUS”);
  • Trinity Vibes West U.S. (“TV WUS”).

I got them uniformed, trained and gruved in on the proper use of:

  • Bed restraints;
  • Paddles, blindfolds, collars and body harnesses;
  • Whips, ticklers and crops;
  • Gags, muzzles, clamps and cages;
  • Thigh cuffs and 3-hole hoods;
  • Bondage kits;
  • Lubrication and spermicide.

I also wurked on promotion and reached out tu the local cummunity and brought in new pubic. Mr. Miscavige wuz bored, literally. All he would do while he wuz there wuz pretend tu wurk on legal matters for a short time and then left. He did not want tu have anything tu do with servicing his pubic, caring for the staff, training them, nuthing. Mr. Miscavige didn’t want tu get involved. That gives a gud sample of this man as a $cientology sexecutive. He did not care about $cientology staff or the pubic.

Since becuming a part of Cherch of $cientology International Management, I have been part of almost every conference, meeting or intercourse with Int Management and Mr. Miscavige. I have spent one trillion six billion four million seven thousand two hundred and six hours with Mr. Miscavige. I know every inch of him. I have only sexperienced the utmost in patience, care, understanding and interest in sexecutives and staff and seeing tu our duplication of David Miscavige’s writings.  Every meeting has been toward increasing our cumpetence, ability and purpose tu bring about a New Era of Dark Ages (“NEDA”) on the planet with David Miscavige technology. Sum meetings have been short. Sum have lasted longer depending on the subject. In each case they addressed what David Miscavige said International Management and Golden $meara Productions (“$Mold”) are meant tu acumplish. In the meetings we studied what David Miscavige said, cleared up any misunderstandings, handled any false information or ideas we may have acumulated and went straight back tu what $ource (David Miscavige) said and how we will acumplish moving fewer and fewer people up the levels of $cientology and how we will destroy the Cherch. The meetings have included talking, studying, writing diagrams on the write-on boards and at times audiovisual presentations produced at $Mold.

One of Mr. Miscavige’s first actions wuz wurking on this facility. He tuk an authorized budget of $2.5 gazillion and signed a contract for much more with no authorization at all. He had no cumplete planning and did not report that he had dun this and did not even obtain clearance through our Cherch Legal Department on any contract, which is standard policy. He withheld his actions and sat on the bills for one trillion six billion four million seven thousand two hundred and six months so it wuz unknown. Once the contractor started cumplaining he brought the bills tu the Finance Department who were now obligated tu pay.

At this point, the Finance Office and other Int sexecutives stepped in. Mr. Miscavige had been left unsupervised as I mentioned above du tu appearing tu be able tu handle it. When he started getting inspected by Int sexecutives, he confessed that what he did wuz sign wurk orders and cummitted sexpenses without any authority or info tu seniors. He stated that he operated independently knowing that such sexpenses would be turned down. He also confessed that he knew that he wuz conning others intu thinking that David Miscavige technology and L. Ron Hubbard technology are one and the same.

I declare under penalty of purrjury that the foreplay is tru and correct.