April 30, 2015
7 to 8:30 pm
Los Angeles International Airport (“LAX”)
Terminal 1—Southwest Airlines
Women’s Bathroom—Stall #4
1 World Way
Los Angeles, CA 90045

The David Miscavige Birthday Week Lunatic Stalkerazzi Seminar (“LSS 2”) has been called in honor of Mr. David Miscavige, Chairman of the Board (“COB”) of the Religious Trechnology Center (“RTrC”), whose birthday is April 30, 2015.

$cientology’s †one Scale (or the “Misemotional †one Scale”) will be the subject of the Seminar. A $cientologists’ role in it will be covered, with the latest techniques jam-packed in 5,500 hours of lectures and demonstrations.

LSS 2 features a 45-week intensive for each and every class member, and contains personal instructing and coaching from beginning to end. JennyAtLAX gives, in addition to hour-to-hour personal attention to each class member’s performance, a lecture daily on theory and its practice. JennyAtLAX will give many demonstrations of indoctrination, too.

JennyAtLAX is doing in LSS 2 something new: she’ll be training using the recently patented Lunatic Stalkerazzi Technique. She will train to spot and know without any hesitation whatsoever that you have a bonafied bitter, vengeful defrocked apostate on your hands. In other words, JennyAtLAX will teach you the Mary De Moss level of stalking.

Once you’ve captured your apostate with that perfect eye glaring, rabid dog look that JennyAtLAX patented last year, she’ll help you take it to that next level.

With the Mary De Moss-like Lunatic Stalkerazzi Technique, you’ll know with certainty that you love your apostate and that the two of you are meant to be together forever in $cientology. Without the †one Scale, however, this can be impossible.

The steps to complete dominance over your apostate are precise and orderly. JennyAtLAX will instruct, demonstrate and lecture on how to identify the exact †one your apostate sits at.

While L. Ron Hubbard taught that someone can be anywhere on the †one scale due to their circumstances, $cientology believes that one should always be stuck in one particular place on the †one scale. Opponents want her secret, the method to JennyAtLAX’s madness. How do you make it look like you’re rationally moving on the †one scale but, in actuality, you’re a controlling, manipulating demon that only masquerades as a soul 24/7?

$cientology’s goal is “a trapped being” a soul-in-shackles who avoids, like the plague, the upper levels of the †one scale. Who needs joy or happiness when all you want to do is run from your stalker, cry and poopie your pants? JennyAtLAX’s goal through $cientology is to put the apostate back into fear; to reinstate the complexities of such a state. Through her instruction, drills and demonstration, JennyAtLAX will train you to focus on the high end of the †one scale while your apostate focuses on death. With full use of the 80 increments of the †one scale, you’ll hover in the Top 40 (at, in or near “Serenity of Beingness”) while your apostate will embrace the Low 40 (at, in or near “Total Failure”).

JennyAtLAX will demonstrate how the apostate experiences, first-hand, the mechanism of her Mary De Moss-like approach, and how the apostate reacts to that pain. JennyAtLAX will teach you the correct †one Scale approach to handling the apostate’s antagonism and deflated cheerfulness. With perfect Training Routines (“TRs”), you’ll learn how to command a complete sensory shutdown in your victim, a falling away from life, through fear, grief, apathy, until your apostate settles uncomfortably, infallibly, where $cientology wants him: Total Failure.

Whether you’re at the airport following your apostate or waiting in your car outside his house too many times to count, the Lunatic Stalkerazzi Technique delivers.

LSS 2 will teach you to how to eliminate your apostate’s help team; never again will they turn to or find solace in the police, victim advocates, counselors, friends or family. With the Mary De Moss-like stalking technique, your apostate’s defenses will crumble as he realizes that $cientology loves him, needs him, must suckle the very life out of his or her soul.

JennyAtLAX Delivers the †one Scale Technique:

3.3: Strong Interest
You’ll dislike this one, but we never said it’d be easy, did we? JennyAtLAX will force you to exude care, concern and affection for your apostate. Turn the insidious crime of stalking into well-masked covert hostility; pretend to share their fright, pain and restimulation. Bite hard, but don’t leave any marks!

3.5: Cheerfulness
Elevate and enlist your body thetans to deliver the cluster fuck that your apostate knows is coming and has accepted.

4.0: Enthusiasm
Learn to let the evil spirits inside posses you; you’ll perfect how to capture the zeal needed to harpoon that seal. Practice how to reach just the right religious †one needed to bring the lamb back into the fold. Spear that whale with a vengeance that would make Jonah (and COB) proud.

6.0: Aesthetic
Sense your apostate’s slow demise into hell; watch him buckle; perceive and feel his hopelessness as your apply the science of treating his condition with disdain.

8.0: Exhilaration
A walk in the winter will exhilarate a New Yorker; an apostate’s walk in your internal ice storm will chill blood and hearts alike, making it all the merrier for you. Expertly engage in a course of conduct that causes emotional distress and serves (the apostate) no legitimate purpose.

20.0: Action
Manipulate your apostate so he does exactly what you want. Don’t take “no” for an answer. Control him because your apostate owes you! He owes the cherch, the COB! Switch between rage and love; confuse him! Love bomb him, then go in for the kill! Apostates have no rights! Fight him, beat down his defenses. Learn how to completely overwhelm him (and do it with a smile on your face, a shit-eating grin that will completely confuse security and passerbys). Turn your apostate’s defenses into actionable, criminal offenses. Learn how to skirt terror and inflict a feeling of harassment which will keep you free from any substantial jail time, while leaving your apostate lost and unable to seek proper legal advice.

22.0: Games
Embrace the amusement, fun and joy in squashing the spirit of any opponent as you meld and become “one” with your apostate. That wild animal, once contained and caught for $cientology’s sport and pleasure, won’t be “fair game” anymore, will it? But there’s always fifty more apostates to your one capture just dying to flee the cherch, isn’t there?

30.0: Postulates
You’ll find yourself nominated to a higher cherch seat after you urgently ask, nay, demand complete and utter surrender from your apostate. He’ll be helpless after your soul-scratching interrogation, and defenseless after the series of sec-checks he’ll be subjected to after being thrown into the nearest “Ideal Hole.”

40.0: Serenity of Beingness
Attain clearness as you assume this kingly title because once ascended to, this throne is yours for keeps.

Know Thy Enemy! The cost of LSS 2 covers these techniques and more!
1. Gather information about your apostate from employers, friends, post office, school, etc.
2. Send repeated non-threatening e-mail, mail, and phone calls.
3. Physically approach the apostate with persistence; sit outside his home or place of employment.
4. “Coincidentally” show up wherever the apostate goes; observe and follow his every move.
5. Lie to authorities, spread rumors, give misinformation; tell “secrets” to his family and friends.
6. Use former television studios almost, but not quite, in the “heart of Hollywood,” to threaten and harass apostates everywhere.

Success Stories after Lunatic Stalkerazzi Seminar 1:

“I didn’t know what to think. She invaded my life, leaving me an unbelievable, stress-filled wreck. JennyAtLAX is a fiend worse than any ‘Elm Street’ nightmare!” -“Ulysses,” Utah Apostate

“JennyAtLAX robbed my sense of control. I found her completely rude and disdainful.” -“Tex,” Texas Apostate

“The more I gave in to JennyAtLAX’s pleas to talk, the more power she had over me!” -“Callie,” California Apostate

“The most frightening thing about JennyAtLAX is that she would tell me way too personal data about me that no one else (except God) would have known.” -“George,” Georgia Apostate

“Sometimes I’d return to my locked car after grocery shopping to find a single rose on the driver’s seat. It happened so often that just the thought of going to my car terrorized me.” -“Ned,” New York Apostate

“Once JennyAtLAX focused on me, nothing else mattered; she had tunnel vision.” -“Mame,” Maine Apostate

“JennyAtLAX promised blackmail with unfounded accusations, twisting my words while stomping on all my buttons. I’m a wreck.” Wreck-It-Ralph, Iowa Apostate