A jury in the Supreme Court of Ireland has found the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland in a religious racket trial guilty on all counts.

It was the first time in the history of Ireland that a complete religion had been placed on trial. The blanket verdict that the jury reached is a sweeping victory for Chief Prosecutor John Z. McGhee.

The jury was out for no more than twenty minutes and twenty of those were spent at dinner. Thus, in two minutes, they ran through a 666-page indictment and found the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland guilty of all charges.

The Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland has been found guilty of lying and pretending that they are a religion and care about the poor and homeless in Ireland.

In addition, the Irish Supreme Court, through an impressive presentation by Chief Prosecutor McGhee, has determined that all that the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland wanted to do was rob its parishioners, ruin its critics and rape and plunder Ireland with wild abandon.

In general, the case against the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland is that they established a reign of terror as soon as the ribbon-cutting ceremony ended on Saturday, October 15, 2016, at Number 4 Merrion Square North, in the city of Dublin. “It is a tragedy,” Chief Prosecuter McGhee said in his closing statement before the jury, “that such a legendary location, nay, a landmark facility, should suffer suppression and oppression by the executives and staff of the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland.”

Irishmen large and small testified they they had been Body Routed by the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland and told to forfeit all of their worldly goods in the name of: Scientology; its, founder, L. Ron Hubbard; and its current Pope, David Miscavige.

This was followed by numerous visits twenty-four/seven by the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland’s Registrars—hired thugs whose sole objectives included the extraction of every penny and gold filing from the Church’s Irish parishioners.

The delivery of the guilty verdict afforded a most dramatic scene. The jurors had returned from their dinner break at 8:00 P.M., the courtroom assembled and, at 8:04 P.M.,  the jurors filed in.

The foreman, Pete X. Griffiths, said in answer to a question from Court Clerk Andrea Q. Garner that a verdict had been reached. The Church of Scientology National Affairs Office was required to stand. Mr. Griffiths pulled from the inside of his jacket several sheets of paper and spread them out on the rail of the jury box before him.

Ms. Garner asked first: “How do you find on the lying count?”

“Guilty,” said Mr. Griffiths in a smooth voice. Ms. Garner repeated the same procedure on the pretense counts to which Mr. Griffiths repeated, “Guilty.”

The Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland stood at one side of the courtroom. At first, its face was expressionless. As Mr. Griffiths supplied the word, “guilty,” the Church changed its expression ever-so-slightly.

The Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland leaned on the counsel table with both hands, its eyes showing fright when it looked around. Next, the Church winced as if its face had been slapped.

As the word “guilty” echoed through the courtroom, the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland’s head began bobbing like the head of a toy on the end of a spring. A smile spread over its features. Then, the Church licked its lips and the lines of its seamed face deepened.

Suddenly, the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland gulped hard. Perhaps it had been hoping for the best up until the last moment.

The Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland began to mumble, its voice growing louder. Deputy Sheriffs closed in behind the Church and grabbed its arms. “Do birds fly? Do fish swim?” it said, thus beginning the Church’s protest against the verdict.

The Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland’s mumbling went on and on and on, growing in volume, as Supreme Court Justice William I. Drummond turned to the jurors.

“There’s something I need to say to you,” Justice Drummond began.

“Look at that wall! Walk over to that wall!” said the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland.

Justice Drummond tried to ignore the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland, but he ended up being the only person in the courtroom not watching the Church. “Thank you on behalf of Ireland,” Justice Drummond said to the jurors.

The jurors filed out and Justice Drummond instructed the bailiffs to bring the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland around so that Clerk Garner could obtain its pedigree. The Church’s voice then rose high above the murmur of the courtroom.

“I’ll go when my Completed Staff Work is signed, sealed and delivered, and not a moment sooner!” the Church told the bailiffs.

The bailiffs were reticent about handling the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland roughly. The more they tried to quiet the Church, the louder its voice became. Finally, with a dozen men surrounding it, the Church was led to a room in the back of the courtroom, where its voice could be heard growing louder and louder. Soon, the Church of Scientology National Affairs Office of Ireland was hysterical.

Justice Drummond set March 13, 2017, as the date for sentence. Ironically, March 13 is also the birthday of Hubbard, the Church’s founder.

Sources:

Inishowen Independent, “Church of Scientology fully committed to Ireland,” October 26, 2016.

PR Newswire, “Church of Scientology Cuts One in the Emerald Isle,” October 16, 2016.

The New York Times, “7 in Cafe Racket Guilty,” March 26, 1937.

Imikimi, “Jail Bars.”

Loonapix, “Reading Journal in the 1950’s.”

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